i have nothing smart to say right now.
i feel alone, even when people say they're with me.
know why?
because they never show me they are.
i'm easily excited by a single text, a small note...
it's how i know people remember me in their busy lives.
if i don't have people, what do i have?
i have me.
but i'm a mess of tangled demons.
a rare few know of these demons in me, though perhaps many have experienced the outlash of them.
they make me a hell to live with, especially when it's all i've got.
when i let others in, i too often feel used, betrayed, or otherwise hurt.
but sometimes i wonder if it's just these demons attacking my brain, planting these thoughts in my head, these thoughts that i'll be alone forever, that no one cares.
yes, i go by action, but maybe i'm too sensitive or paranoid.
i just don't know anymore.